Law of Success: The Untold Secrets

Law of Success:  The Untold Secrets

Archive for the Category 'Dreams'

What Change Are You Truly Hungry For?

Monday, February 11th, 2019

A dear friend got very intrigued about opening a frozen yogurt shop in her small town. She did the research, got her husband on board, looked for locations, and choked just before she made the complete investment in this new business, and turned to her tried and true connection, her animal friends. Her husband dreams of being a semi-truck driver because he wants the freedom from supporting the family financially. He wants to get on the road and travel. Be away from bosses, and work obligations. Neither has reached the point where they are so hungry for happiness and success that they have found a way to change.

Two of my neighbors really want to be svelte and gorgeous. They struggle with their weight and their diet. One neighbor has been in a relationship that has been on again, off again during the whole time I known her. She describes that relationship as both very supportive and very abusive. She too threw herself into the relationship with her wonderful dog, until that dog passed away. Her new dog has challenged her to the max.

My son broke up with his girlfriend in December, and she immediately started dating a male friend with whom she had been dancing in a play. In January, he got laid off by the tech company in which he had invested 60 – 80 hours weeks. He was so tired and discouraged that he needed nine months to recover physically, before he could look for a new job and a new relationship. During that time, he was able to get clear. He wanted to move from the very small town in Vermont, be in a larger place where he would have opportunities to meet new friends and new work opportunities and not see his ex-girlfriends every time he went downtown.

He was exceedingly hungry for change. It came out of the adversity of his life. It made him hungry for happiness. Hungry for a different kind of success.

It took time. He took the time to focus on his food, and lose weight. He began to change his image. Imagine a 30-something male taking time to develop a hairstyle, skin regimens, and go through his wardrobe to really look his best. It was so fun to watch. And grueling for him. There was no guarantee any of it would pay off during his nine-months of not knowing what he would do next.

He now lives in Manhattan, across the street from where he works, on a less trafficked street where there is not as much noise. That’s important because he is a one of those people who has sleep issues. He’s got a job that he got easily. It came out of his hunger for change, and taking inspired actions. His hunger for success that wouldn’t hurt him and his body propelled him into living in a new way, and it has been amazing to watch.

I too am very hungry for change. I got very sick during the last five months. Lost my autonomy. My daughter had to come live with me, drive me everywhere, do grocery shopping, cook for me, do my laundry. And that is hard on our relationship. It scared me deeply. My huge hunger for my autonomy has propelled me to take longer and longer walks to build up my strength, and climb stairs. It has made me hungry to fix my own meals in the morning, which might be gluten free toast and eggs. It has made me hungry to really change my life core deep pattern that I have been carrying.

I was reading my September journal recently, and was blown away to see an entry where I was just so angry with so many things, and my guidance (to whom I was writing) said “well, you may just need to really experience being a victim, to really get this.” What?

My coach who has been working with me to help overcome life-long patterns and beliefs helped me identify that my core life pattern has been based on being a victim to circumstances, especially circumstances that I was born into. Circumstances that create survival and contracting. In January, my coach was asking me a really hard question. “Why are you not being able to drop this victim identification? You have cleaned up so many patterns, what is it that is still stuck?”

Grappling with that question really helped me understand how I got into this current health situation. I am a super-sensitive person. That gives me some wonderful strengths. It also makes me vulnerable to what other people think of me. Because of this I have had some really challenging times doing what is in my own best interests, and instead try to do what is expected of me. Here where I live, and with my pet-sitting clients that became particularly hard in October, when a client wanted to leave her brain-damaged husband in my care. I was able to state my concerns, but she left without getting them resolved. The result was that I needed to intervene with his family and then I got ill as a result. I was supersensitive, tried to be too nice, and didn’t take care of myself. So I created a circumstance where I got to live out once again being a victim to circumstance and learned the huge consequence to my health.

Now; from a much bigger (dragon’s eye view) perspective; I see that I got myself into a situation where I really became hungry enough to burst out of this major life identification, and I chose to get ill so that I could build the hunger deep enough to propel me past the blocks, past the reluctance to change that status quo, past all the gobbledygook that my small self throws out, and past all the resistance that would come up when I tried to change this core life issue.

Simultaneously that Universe gave me the opportunity to understand better how I got into this life-long pattern of being on the Victim, Perpetrator, Rescuer platform, where most of humanity hangs out. And how this Highly Sensitive Person Syndrome (surviving when the world overwhelms you) and my Active Alert Temperament are all related and have set up my body for this autoimmune condition I have been experiencing once again. I wrote a blog entry in 2016 called Resolve where I publicly resolve to change this core pattern and look at these temperament characteristics. That was just as I was beginning work with my coach. Finding that blog entry is another sign. Looking for Signs from the Universe is so important. Thank heavens I can finally have some larger perspective.

Because I was so hungry and driven to be able to answer my coach’s questions, I serendipitously ran across the book “The Deepest Well: Healing The Long-Term Effects of Childhood Adversity.” I needed to understand why I was having so much trouble. I like knowing. That birthed my last Post called Success and Acute Childhood Adversity.”

Knowing this research about Acute Childhood Trauma is a huge missing piece about the human condition and about my human and body condition. In the reviews on Amazon, there were a number of people who couldn’t read or listen to the book because the research did not make them hopeful, nor was there a lot of practical guidance about coping. But in the one of the five star reviews, writer and counselor Lucille Zimmerman who has done her own five years of research with this group wrote “Trauma can be the springboard that catapults people into higher and better ways of functioning than before. In spite of the pain and suffering, the trauma actually ends up giving some people an advantage in life.”

It actually can give you the huge hunger to change your life. When you are hungry to change, you can go past the barriers of self-doubt, and old ways of seeing and believing. It can give you the huge motivation to go beyond your deepest resistance.

It took me three years to get hungry enough to change my diet in a major way. I dropped sugar and alcohol, and other inflammation producing foods like dairy. And it has been pretty easy to stay on that plan, because the hunger for health and wellness was way bigger than the value of what I would get by having a piece of strawberry shortcake.

What is it that you are really hungry for? Hunger gives you a Burning Desire. Hunger gives you a Burning Goal. Your own largest self is calling you. It’s telling you what you are ready to do next. Looking for success for most of us is really looking for ways to be happy, and ways to step into our strengths and our best and largest ways of contributing. I am here to tell you that your own guidance and intuition is always there supporting you to find your way into your larger growth.

Sometimes we can’t hear the message, because our vision of ourselves has shrunk. And that might be a reason to reach out to someone like a coach who can hold the larger vision of you, help you see the bigger picture, and help you translate your hunger into an inspired action plan. We’ll talk about that in an upcoming blog. For today, you can ask the question of yourself, what is it that I am really hungry for?

Am I hungry for hope, am I hungry for the job of my dreams, and am I hungry for connection to deal with this immense loneliness that I feel inside? Am I hungry to have financial success because I am drowning in debt? Am I hungry to have the freedom to live my life the way I want, and it’s hard to be a parent, or have a partner or a family that I am having to support? Am I hungry to be healthy because I have chronic conditions like diabetes, asthma, chronic fatigue syndrome, heart conditions or something that is really debilitating my ability to enjoy my life? Am I hungry to express my creativity through art, painting, singing, sculpture, dancing, pottery, or some other way such as writing?

We are in times of change. Our hunger can tell us the direction of the change we are moving in. It can give us the powerful intention and motivation to change and be a success.

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Vision Boards and Goal Setting

Saturday, January 31st, 2015

Vision Boards are something I complete at least once a year. In December of 2014 and January of 2015 I contemplated what I would like my vision for this year to be. The title I gave to this particular board is “Life Is Good.” Colors and words really energize me so I have a precious box of clippings of headlines, photos, words that I draw from. I go through magazines looking for particular things that grab me. It is so fun.

Before I started the vision board, I just held the question in my heart “What do I want to focus upon in 2015. What are the specific areas I want to grow?” This year I had several areas.

Wellness

      Eating better, feeling better physically, stay healthy
      Emotional wellbeing: to treasure myself.

Embracing the Now. Really savoring the moment, every hour, every day and asking the question
“What can I offer the word that no one else around here can?”

Grow my consulting practice where I practice presence, guided by soul, and help others create great lives for themselves with a power new technique I am developing.

Play with friends and share joy and smiles.

Enjoy Intimacy with a beloved by getting close without going nuts. Then I found the best quote that I would not have put on my board before now, which says that “Intimacy is a willingness to be vulnerable.” Oofda! Now that’s some personal courage, because Vulnerability scares me to death.

Find my new place that is an oasis to nourish my heart and mind, feed my soul, where I can savor the summer, garden and be joyful.

My process is an intuitive organic one which is like the intuitive way I live my life. When I finish, I have created something visually attractive that holds my attention all year long.

Other people like to be more goal oriented. Whatever works for you is terrific.

If you are more logically, sequential in your thinking, then I would invite you to listen to Vishen Lahkiani who is the CEO or MindValley and FinerMinds, which are personal development companies that are very inspiring. He did a speech redefining goals. He separates goals into 2 categories. Are these means goals or are they end goals?
Three questions help you turn your attention to End Goals.

      What experiences do I want in my life?
      How do I want to grow?
              How do I want to contribute?

You can listen to Vishen’s talk Goals Revisited. I urge you to listen to a description that helps you convert your thinking from taking steps to achieve an end, to seeing a broad vision for yourself ad directing yourself toward that dream.

Another framework is to try to make sure your life is balanced by making aspirations in 12 areas in your life.

      A) Health and Fitness
      B) Intellectual Life- skills, languages
      C) Emotional Life –happiness in the now, getting rid of limiting beliefs
      D) Character – values, what do you believe in, compassion, humor
      E) Spiritual Life – how often do you meditate, feeling more interconnected with all life
      F) Love Relationships – Learning to Care for Other, for Self, for the Relationship
      G) Parenting Vision
      H) Social Life
      I) Financial Life
      J) Career: What do you want to build?
      K) Quality of Life
              L) Life Vision – what mark do you want to leave on the world

These 12 categories are discussed in another Vishen talk called The Theory of Awesomeness: How to live in the Ultimate State of Human Existence that he got from a man named John Butcher.

Here’s my thought. To build a balanced life, you want to think about the huge vision of your life and create what I call a life plan. I can’t accomplish a goal in each one of these areas in one year of my life. I just can’t focus on that many things. It puts me into overwhelm. But if you have some extra time, you may want to begin creating a Life Plan, just as banks require Business Plans if they are thinking of giving you funds. If you write it down, you are much more likely to achieve your vision.

A couple of other blog entries might be helpful for creating Vision Boards

Be Clear About What You Want: The Key to Vision Boards
Law of Success Vision Boards
New Year’s Resolutions and Vision Boards
Prosperity Secret of 17 Seconds
Intention
Setting Daily Intentions

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To Flow or Not to Flow; That Is the Question

Saturday, June 14th, 2014

There is a parable that has served me whenever I am transitioning into something big. It goes like this.

    Along the bottom of a great crystal river lived a village of creatures who clung to the rocks and twigs to hold against the current. The water flowed with great ferocity. Tightly the creatures gripped their river bottom to hold against the flow.

Eventually one creature said, this current seems to know where it is going. I am tempted to let follow this movement. The other villagers cried, “no, no, you will be dashed and bashed against the rocks.  The only way to survive is hang on here forever.” And so the creature stayed for a while longer, struggling to control his grip against the powerful flow.

One day, in a depressed, fatigued moment, he said “if this is all there is then I choose to let go and at least die in the adventure. All I know is clinging, and gripping and resisting the momentum of this terrible current and it is not enough.” In one breath, he pried his fingers from his small rock. Immediately he was taken, rolled, and tumbled into many obstacles becoming bruised. And for many long moments, he thought ‘what have I done?’

Sweeping around the curve in the river, he became aware that he was aloft in the clear waters. Below him were other villages of creatures who noticed him, and cried “look there is one like us who flies!”

And he pondered his long life of clinging, and his life now of flying, and he was glad.

This parable from Richard Bach’s book Illusions inspired me as I moved, left a long relationship, changed jobs and cities when I was young and lived in Florida. Shall I cling to the old, or let go into the flow of the unknown and see what it reveals? That choice to let go of a life where I was not truly happy, allowed me to move into a life that held more fulfillment.

I left my profession as a private investigator and repossessor, collection agency manager, and went back to college, finished my undergrad work, worked in the Career Office of Eckerd College, and fell in love with Academia, small private schools and the community that worked together to support the education of young people. That move allowed me to also study Humanistic Psychology (which was a forerunner of transpersonal psychology), to practice Tai Chi at dawn along the bay seawall, immersed in salt air, and pelican cries as we watched the sun rise. My roommate was studying Psychosynthesis in her Master’s program, and I began my long term love affair with Roberto Assagioli and Carl Jung.

Deeply part of that three years was Rolphing and attending Laws of Life classes, Shusta, the Kaballah, Dream Analysis, Huna, Astrology, and exposure to other ancient wisdoms and esoteric philosophies such as Theosophy, taught or offered in the bookstore of The Temple of the Living God, my spiritual home.

It was the most fertile period of my life, for it held the seeds of all that I pursued for the rest of my life.

Had I held tight to what I knew at the bottom of the river as it pressed forward, I would lack so much depth and breadth.

Richard Bach’s metaphor continued(s) to help me remember the possibility of flow. With each shift of life, there would come a time, when I would become clutching and rigid again, holding to what I knew, rather than experience that majesty of drifting in the flow. And by now, I knew that to let go meant some mighty bumps and bruises before I was swept into the flow of the current.

“Am I flowing, or clutching the river bottom?” became a question I would ask as my life would continue in a cycle. Many times, I found I was clutching the river bottom.

Richard Bach became one of my internal mentors as I read Bridge Across Forever, and One. I had begun writing in my late teens. His storytelling imparts great wisdom in a compelling way. I wanted to model myself after he and his wife. I was fascinated with his way of living, perhaps in a trailer with books overflowing both sides of his bed, living with the love of his life, trying to save a forest of trees. Then later he moved from Oregon to the San Juan Islands. As I read his story, I felt those islands call to me.

It is only now in hindsight that I see the deep desire that was covered by the strong belief I could never do it. The belief was so strong that I never held living in the San Juans as a goal. Besides, I was married, had small children and lived in Minnesota when I first heard the siren call of the islands.

When I hit the stall last year, I was confused and concerned. I couldn’t lift out of it. My continued use of Psychosynthesis techniques and philosophy over my lifetime suggested that I trust the process. That I trust my process. When one is down, it is much harder to hold to higher levels of understanding, because we have shrunk in awareness, and our capacity to problem solve shrinks.

All I could do is continue to ask the question “what is going on?” When I received no answers, I had to surrender to the process. Yes, I had gotten sick, yes, my dearest brother had almost died and it terrified me, yes, I got into a brouhaha with my closest friend, and we weren’t speaking. Yes, I got into another challenging situation with the community in which I lived. Even collectively, there wasn’t a good enough reason to have taken my urge to write. I have been through many adversities. This time, I dithered. I lost some hope and eventually began to be resigned to where I was emotionally.

However I was asking for help from the universal managers, and any non-human helper that would listen.

Then my roommate brought home this exercise that she had done that had shifted her perspective immensely about someone who had done her great harm with intention. When I saw her attitude had changed in one hour from using a process called NeuroMastery, I wanted to take that class. You can read more about that story by reading Transformation is at hand.

I felt inspired at a time when little had been interesting. I followed that inspiration to act. I signed up for the class. Amazing things happened.

My daughter signed up as well. Between the exercises that I was doing every day, I realized that I had shut off a part of me. One of my dearestly held qualities is that of aliveness. Would you believe that there are a lot of places where aliveness is not treasured. Bringing the fullness of me to many situations where I live was breaking some norms. Others saw it as too emotional, too loud, to consuming, too much.

I had slowly been conforming to what others would prefer from me at cost to myself, and it had all happened under the surface without my awareness. When I realized what I had done (others did not do it to me, I had done it to myself), I had a huge aha. Immediately followed the strong decision that I was not going to give up my aliveness for anything or anyone.

As I shared this with my daughter, she said “Mom. When I saw you three months ago, I was appalled. I didn’t recognize you. You had resigned yourself to getting older and living as you were currently. I didn’t see any dreams or enthusiam for which you are know.” Resignation! As she said it, the truth of that statement resonated inside. The truth was I couldn’t even find any dreams to have. Two major ahas, back to back. They energized me. The decision to embrace my aliveness filled me with resolution.

I had been thinking I would live in this community for the rest of my life, because I love it here. But what to do with the variance between the norms of being business-like, without passion at meetings, and the exuberance I share at the top of my lungs? For the first time, I considered the possibility of living somewhere else.

Now here is how I experience my decisions about identity and where I live. It was like having little latches inside, where as I committed to living in this community, a part of me “latched” into the reality of living here, in this community and in this town. Not too dissimilar from grasping the bottom rocks of the river. Which begs the question, of “how do I live in commitment, but not in rigidity, or resignation?” But that is for another entry.

Simultaneously, the community choir that has brought me such joy changed directors. It was great at first, then later, as the concert approached we got more and more tense about our ability to perform, because we were singing incredibly difficult pieces. I don’t normally go around getting mad at stuff, but I got mad at my director and my section. I noticed that my mad was disproportionate to what stimulated them. I was reacting like crazy. To the point where another latch that I had made to this community because of the choir was unlocked. I grumbled “Choir is about singing, having joy, and this is no longer fun, just hard work.” I was mad enough, and committed enough to having joy in my life, that I wouldn’t waste time in an activity that did not give back to me in fulfillment and joy.

When I moved in with my roommate two years ago, I was in bliss because I lived with someone of like mindedness and we care about each other. When she lost her job last October pushing her into retirement far earlier that she considered, suddenly there were two adults home all day long. I noticed that I was getting cranky about not having enough space in my room. Circumstances had suddenly invited me to consider living alone. The third latch was loosened.

These synchronicities were not brought about me consciously. But there was a deeper process at work behind the scenes.

And it was at this point that I made a pivotal choice. Instead of cancelling my trip to the San Juan Islands, I would go. I was pretty grumpy, energized, and not sure where all the movement was going. There was a lot of bruising. And then when I arrived and stepped off the ferry, I felt my world sync and morph as I began to “Dwell in Possibilities“.

Every time I go to the islands, I remember my journeys through Richard Bach’s world. I don’t know where he lives now, but I think it is still in the San Juan Islands. These islands call to me. I go out to the park, and look over the waters to the mountains rising on Lummi, Orcas, Guemes and other islands.
Every time I head downtown, I crest a large hill and there before me is the Bay and the waters shimmering in the sunlight, or even fog, and my heart leaps.

As I gaze across the expanse of water, my energy flows, lifts, and expands. What would it be like to live closer?

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Dwell in Possibility

Monday, June 09th, 2014

The San Juan Islands have called to me for more than 25 years. So much so, that here in the last third of my life, I have migrated to the Pacific Northwest. My favorite spots on the mainland are always where I can see the water and the islands.

Two months ago, my naturalist friend invited me to go with her and her daughter to visit an island I had not seen. I said yes. As the time to visit approached, I began to second think myself. I was very busy preparing for a choral concert. Many of my clients had requested my time. I was tired. I had too much to do. I wasn’t feeling well. I almost cancelled. Why would I tell you this? Because the decision to go was important. I almost overrode myself, and easily could have, because I have a huge internal responsibility carrier.

In the end, I was miffed at some things, and I just said to myself. “I have never had this opportunity to go. I want to go. I am going.” That decision changed my life.

Travel in the San Juans requires using ferries. When I walked onto the ferry, it was raining in Anacortes. When I walked off on Orcas, it was sunny and blue skies. For the hour or so on the ferry, you watch the seagulls, the seascape reflecting a huge sky, and are charmed by sailboats, and kayaks, and possibly a whale. It is one of my most loved activities, standing forward in the salt air, watching this pristine world go by. It just soothes my soul.

Orcas the island has mountains and forests, and lots of coast, as three fjord-like bays push themselves up from the bottom of the island. The Pacific Northwest has some of the cleanest water and air that can be found in the US. Waters come barreling down from the glaciers and snow covered Cascade Mountains, through the salmon filled rivers into the Salish Sea. The peoples of this area want to protect their beautiful habitats.

Yes, I love this area. I love the people here who love their wildlife and spawning grounds. In the islands, people grow huge organic gardens surrounded by 8 feet fences so not to provide a continuing brunch to the native deer. When I ride by the farms or the forests or beaches clogged with driftwood, my heart just brims with fulfillment.

And so it was that I woke the next morning, went for a walk with my jasmine tea, and looked west over the marina and tiny island outside of Deer Harbor. My friend worked on a watercolor painting before we headed to our afternoon adventure of driving to the top of Mount Constitution, the highest lookout in the San Juan Islands. As we stepped into the car, she handed me a brand new mug asking “Can you use this?” Scribed on a pink bank of color were the words from Emily Dickinson “Dwell in Possibility.”

A shiver went through me. “Absolutely I can use this,” I answered. And I did. For the next two days, I contemplated the notion of dwelling in possibilities. “What would it be like to live in an environment like this? How did I feel when I contemplated such a possibility? What would it be like to have my children visit me in such a setting? What kind of views would I enjoy with my morning tea? What would it be like to live where cell phone coverage is spotty? Which did I prefer, a water view, or a valley view?”

As I drifted through the bliss of the next two days, we went to Lopez Island where the best Ice Cream in the world is made, and you can sit in the ferry line and buy a pint from the truck ahead of you at island prices.

In my imagination, I tried on many places to live; farms, resorts at the coastal edge, forest cabins, single storied charmers in the village of Eastsound, and a fifty feet sailing yacht at Rosario Resort. It was like going clothes shopping, but much more satisfying. I didn’t engage the part of my mind that says, ‘you don’t have the money for a fifty foot sailboat, or traveling regularly by float plane.’

The days were full of my just enjoying where I was, and saying many ‘what ifs?’ It helped that I wasn’t the driver, I just sat back and enjoyed wherever our car meandered. Around every turn was another unexpected treat.

I sent my inner censor on vacation, while I smelled the colors of sea and sky, and sipped forest paths, drank sunsets and savored the taste of ‘dwelling in possibilities.’ The power of such a feast for the senses, was that I was surrounded by the ‘what is’ of island sights and smells. I haven’t felt that much joy and serenity in a long while. Curiously, I never asked the question as I considered possibilities ‘what would it be like to live here?’ That was just further than my imagination could stretch.

So I pondered and poked and stayed with the pure bliss of the experience of standing on various islands, enjoying flights of fancy inspired by a young woman whose writings did not become famous until after her death. Another of her quotes has always been a favorite.

“Hope is the thing with feathers that perches in the soul – and sings the tunes without the words—and never stops at all.”
—Emily Dickinson

Perhaps affected by the transcendalists of her time, she lets the spirit of nature soar through her words.

As I reflect on my experience those three days in the islands, I remember how affected I was by the philosophies of Ralph Waldo Emerson, Ralph Waldo Trine, Henry David Thoreau; transcendentalists, who believed that there is more than what we know that transcends our senses. We come to this knowing through our imagination and intuition and therefore can trust ourselves to be our own authority about what is right for us. Perhaps that is what Thoreau meant about our following a different drummer.

Dwelling in possibilites for three days, set the stage for a whole new adventure.

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Burning Goals

Tuesday, May 29th, 2012

Goals that help us Burn for Success

Goals that burn inside help us to success. I was inspired a couple of weeks ago to look at goals in a new way. I think a new way of defining a goal is vital to being successful in your life. But first let’s refresh our understanding about goals and desires. Burning Desires converted to Burning Goals give a direction to creating our lives. How are desires and goals critical to success? We have to have something to shoot for. It allows us to ask for what we want from the Universe. And then we get to live it, refine it, or shoot for a new goal.


The Power of Aim

We need to aim in a direction. Dreams, Desires, Goals, Visions, and Life Missions are ways we aim ourselves and our lives. Dreams, Desires, Goals, Vision and Mission also serve to fuel our progress towards the goal. So Goals set a direction, and Burning Goals help fuel our motion towards that Desire.

Two Types of Goals
When we want to be successful, we might want to have very specific goals to ensure our success. Vishen Lakhiani of Finer Minds has identified two types of goals. He says there are two types of goals; means goals and end goals. His recent video describes how easily we get seduced by means goals that society tells us will give us the feelings we want. He says

      “End goals are the end result of being human. End goals are about experiencing love, traveling around the world, being truly happy, contributing to the planet and learning new skills.

      Means goals are stuff that society tells us we need to have in place to get to happiness, like getting a good GPA, Getting into a good college, getting into a particular firm, being with one particular someone. Getting a good review at work. Money is a means goal.”

The secret to move your life forward towards what you want is identifying your end goals.

Three Important Questions
Vishen says that we can separate everything we want in life (which are end goals) into three buckets; Experiences, Growth and Contributions. To focus on these, he asks three very important questions that can help us identify these aims.

      What do we want to Experience before we die?
      How do we want to Grow in this lifetime?
      What Do we want to contribute back to the planet while we are here?

These three questions are critical to creating lives that are happy and fulfilled according to Vishen. Vishen takes you through a short exercise to identify these end goals in his video which you can watch at Finer Minds on Goals.

Contrast gives us feedback for new goals
The times we are in are pushing us out of our comfort zone. These times are giving us the opportunity (perhaps even pushing us a bit) to look at what we really want in life. These are very exciting times, and can be quite uncomfortable as well. Our discomfort can be very useful in highlighting what we don’t want. When we turn that into a question of “Well what is it I do want?” we feel burning desire that helps us create what we do want. Now we have a goal that we do want that we can shoot for.

Often however, we have identified a means goal which has burning properties. We want to have a certain car, camera, house, or we want more money, because we are so worried about the bills. The problem is that we get so obsessed with these means goals that we forget the end goals.

To make end goals have a burning quality about this, to give us the propulsion power we need, we can look at the burning desire that comes out of the contrast from what our experience currently is and what we want our experience to be. If we are incredibly stressed about money, making the rent or mortgage payment, finding a job, we have to figure out a way to rename our desire in a way that moves us towards our end goal. Perhaps we want the freedom to work in our own company that contributes to people and provides a bountiful life to us and our family.

In my current occupation, I move around a lot. Out of that experience comes a new end goal. I fervently want a home base that allows me to write and contribute. Curiously enough, my past goal was to travel and to have the freedom to paint and write. I asked and I received. I have been writing, and I have been traveling, and I have had the freedom from structure. Now I find I need a little more structure that a home base would give me. And I want it fiercely. I need it for my health. I need it to be able to produce effectively and I need it because of how it will support and give to me.

The universe heard what I asked for, and gave it to me. I have had three years of living like a nomad (to counter those 30 years of being rooted in the upper Midwest). I fiercely wanted it and I received it. It came in a different form that I visualized it, but I received the lifestyle I asked for. Out of these years of traveling, came the experience of packing and moving several times a month. I don’t like that. That’s the contrast highlighting what I don’t like. Now I use what I don’t like to get clearer about what I do want, so that I can ask the Universe to deliver More Please of what I do want. See how it works?

When the discomfort of moving got intense enough, the discomfort gave me a new burning goal. Which fuels the next ask and receive cycle. Of course my making myself bad and wrong for asking for such a lifestyle certainly has slowed things down, but now that I am back on track, I know that I will receive a breakthrough shortly.

Summary
We have life experience. When we are uncomfortable, we are in our juiciest place of creation. From what we really don’t like, we can create a burning desire or goal. That desire or goal is the form that we give to the creation which is our life. We ask for this from the Universe. The Universe and our higher self collaborates. Situations and circumstances get drawn into our life. I asked for a traveling, nomad lifestyle of writing. It took a bit but I received it.

When we live in this new experience, as I did in my three years of traveling and writing, we get more grist for the mill by the contrast that comes out of our experience. We get to refine our goal, dream or desire, to more accurately reflect what we want. Then we ask, let go, and receive again. It’s the continual dance of creation.

Blessing to you as you identify your own life goals. Go listen to the 13 minute video by Vishen. Continue to build those lists of end goals. Below are some resources to reflect more on dreams, vision, and burning desire.

Dare to Dream
Burning Desire
Recognize and Accept Dreams
Dreams and Survival Thinking
New Years Resolutions (Vision Boards)
Setting Daily Intention
Vision and the Laws of Success
Goal Setting and Three Important Questions Video from Finer Minds

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New Year Resolutions and Vision Boards

Friday, December 31st, 2010

New Year Resolutions often are used by those who practice Law of Success.  It is a time of beginnings.  It is the time that we Resolve to try to do our best.  We set goals. We produce images of the future.  It is a powerful time.

Most of us do not comprehend the power that we invoke when we make New Year Resolutions.  Instead, we hear the internal chatter of how it won’t work, and how most people never follow through on their Resolutions.  But there is great power in New Year Resolutions.

First it is a time when all of us are contemplating the future instead of only stewing about our present or past.  So there is a huge mental mind field that is created by many people thinking about possibilities.  There is no other time in the entire year that holds so much energy and intention about the future, held by so many.

Second.  There is real optimism present in that group think, and it is contagious.  We all can touch into our optimism.

Third.  We give ourselves freedom to dream, and we set goals, both realistic and unrealistic.  It may be to take up some form of exercise, to boost our sales to a new high, look for a job we love, write that book, meet the love of our life, or take karate lessons.

Fourth.  We invoke some of our most potent powers.  Imagination. Creativity, Focus, and Will.  We clear our minds of chatter and imagine a future when we are thin, prosperous, loved, and contribute to the greater good.  Resolve is one of the attributes of Will.  When we say, “I resolve that I will take up an exercise program”, we are invoking that personal will in a powerful way to serve our desire, dreams, and goals.

Fifth:  The way we make these New Year Resolutions is important.  When we write them down, we give these Resolves incredible potency. When we add creativity to these Resolves by making pictures, making a Treasure Map, making a poster of the dreams we want to come true, we are bringing the genies of the universe together to bring to us what we want, because we have such clear images. This is an intense version of the 17 seconds process. Last year I made a vision board also called a treaure map – which is a poster with pictures and goals made out of clippings from magazines.  I wanted to meet a romantic partner, and the pictures that I clipped out all had boats in them.  I did meet a man, and he looked very much like the pictures I had pasted on my board, and his goal was to live on a boat.

Years ago, I made such a vision board/treasure map and I included pictures of places where I might want to visit, and some words and pictures to reflect professional writing.  Later that year, I made a presentation at an international conference on a topic that I had been writing about professionally.  I stopped on the way to visit an old friend in Oregon.  She took me down the Columbia Gorge to Multnomah Waterfalls.  Later when I looked back at my poster, I realized that a photo of that exact waterfall was on that poster.

One law of success guru made such a vision board/treasure map and included a photo of a house to represent his deep desire to live in an beautiful modern affluent home.  Years passed.  He moved.  While unpacking, he ran into the old chart, and his son asked him what it was.  There on that poster was a magazine photo of the exact home that he had just moved into.  Gave me chills to hear his story.

So there is much power in making New Year Resolutions.  The follow-through is also important, because very few of us have received real training about how to muster our attention in the days and weeks that follow.  It is a process.

We will address some of those issues in the following posts.  Today, have fun.  Gather some magazines and clip out words and images that makes your heart sing.  Glue them to a poster. Make your own vision board and treasure map for the coming year.

We  here at OfSuccessLaw.com wish you days of joy and an abundance of prosperity and success.

For a lovely story about the outcome of my last two year’s of vision boards, see Meditation and Manifestation.

For more posts about Creating Vision Boards, please see below:

Be Clear About What You Want: The Key to Vision Boards
Law of Success Vision Boards
New Year’s Resolutions and Vision Boards
Prosperity Secret of 17 Seconds
Intention
Setting Daily Intentions

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Dare to Dream

Thursday, August 05th, 2010


Dare to dream
even though it takes courage. Your dream is the seed that eventually grows into a reality. Without the seed, however, what direction will you create in?

A friend of mine who just turned 50 says “I don’t know what my dreams are. I don’t know what I want to do.” Is it possible that we don’t allow ourselves to dream because we are afraid that they may not come true, that worse yet, they may come true and we don’t want the responsibility for nurturing our life along and the diligence it takes?

This morning I read “When dreams come true: the first novel.” Writing that first novel takes discipline and determination says the article and here is how six authors did it. It was riveting reading, as I was familiar with most of the six, and personally knew Kate Green, a suspense novelist. I was devouring this Sunday magazine, and then I got to the end and there was story called “One who didn’t: a writer with no novel.”

Bob Ehlert concluded his article with

    “Now there is absolutely no physical reason why I have not begun and completed the Great American Novel. …..

    For the first time in a long time I have realized that what is keeping me from writing a novel is the same thing that keeps us from living any dream.

    We wait and we wait and we wait. We are so cautious sometimes, we don’t follow our impulses when they are the brightest and the fastest and the surest sensations of adventure.

    We are so afraid to fail sometimes we don’t even try. “

When I finished reading this last sentence, I realized that Bob had written both articles. He had interviewed six authors. Each of them “never was afraid to be alone because they were always in the company of their dream.”

His quest was to find out how they broke through all their barriers and finished their first work, their dream. He says

    “They used their will to discipline themselves to give up the more common and simple pleasures in order to pursue their writing; to persevere, when, at times, they were the only ones who cared; to dare to fail and complete what they had begun.”

Dreams are tender. When I began this website, I did not let any of my friends know I was writing it. I just kept writing. A year later, when it had grown, and I could see that I would continue to write despite what anyone said, only then did I let friends and relatives know about it. I got a few positive responses, some jealousy, and quite a few were quite eager to point out spelling errors. Fortunately by that time, I received enough response from my readers to keep going. Most importantly, as I reread my own entries, I found they inspired and reinvigorated me.

I began this website to distill what I had been seriously studying for over thirty years. How do people succeed and manifest their dreams? Napoleon Hill was my jumping off point.

When you have your dream seed, then you can take it into your imagination workshop, and begin to flesh it out and grow it. But that’s another day’s topic.

Those six Minnesotan authors had collectively written 58 novels when the article was written. Those books were written because each author had a dream of writing their own book.

Make your dream sacred
. Dare to dream. Give it space in your life. Identify it. Nurture it. Write it down. Begin the adventure of following the direction of your dream. See what happens when you get lost in the contraction of worry and stress (Dreams and survival thinking). Hold your dreams as special. See Recognize and Accept Dreams.

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Recognize and Accept Dreams

Wednesday, June 09th, 2010

Recognize And Accept Dreams

Recognize and accept dreams
because these are two important steps in success. You need your dreams to shoot for. You need your dreams to provide a compass to the essential you. Dreams can be slippery. It is very easy to forget what your dreams are. So recognize your dreams. This is Step One.

When you are caught in stress and the busyness of living it is sometimes hard to remember your dreams. In the last blog, I told you that I could go two places to paint some landscapes that are not far, but would be fun. I had already forgotten those ideas when it came time to write this entry. I had been moving. It has been raining. I forgot. And as a result was a little less of myself. Reaching up out of ordinary life allows you to be more vibrant, alive, full, radiant, and imaginative. Dreams pull you like a magnet towards something that you want.

Treat dreams as though they are cocoons that have radiant energy life forms in them, waiting to burst forth someday to reveal a powerful form of you.

We don’t have a lot of societal support for dreams, so keep them to yourself or share them only with people whom you can trust not to put you down. I have had even my best friend really pooh pooh my most precious dream so be careful with them.

Accept your dreams
. This is Step Two. Whatever your heart desires, this is a dream that belong to you. It is OK to have this dream. It is OK to want something special. That wanting comes from Source and gives you the opportunity to expand and grow. Dreams are delicate. Dreams are tender. Dreams need your loving acceptance of them. Cherish your dreams. Make space for your dreams. Allow them to emerge. And when they emerge, find ways to remember or “capture” your dreams.

Strategies to “Capture” your Dreams
Let the dreams exist. Make a special place for them. Give them their own book. If you’re really brave, get a sketch book in which you can write, and draw, or paste pictures, and add color. Don’t worry about being a great artist. Concentrate on what your dreams are, and then write them down, draw pictures, or paste in pictures from magazines. As you think about them, say to yourself “I accept my dreams.”

Create a Dream Box. Spend an afternoon browsing through magazines. Cut out words, phrases, pictures, images, and articles if you want that represent something you want. Then as life continues on, you can continue to add more to your dream box. My daughter and I went to TJ MAXX and found these wonderful boxes for less than $5.00 a couple of years ago. My daughter filled her box with pictures of horse gear she wanted to buy, furniture she would like to have, and things that made her feel good when she looked at them. My dream box has pictures of couples boating or going to the beach, and a wonderful aqua colored piece of cookware that I will own.

If you are a scrapbooker, then make a wonderful scrapbook showcasing dreams.

A friend of mine made a dream journal of the dreams he had at night, and got lots of images from National Geographic magazines to represent the dreams he recorded. You too can make a dream journal but make it for your waking dreams.

A pocket notebook
that you can keep next to your wallet might be all that you need. Just keep notes on those slippery dreams, and add more, as you get the inspiration. Right now, I have a dream box, a small notebook that I carry all the time, and a larger notebook, where I make notes to follow up. For example. I dream about painting watercolor paintings outdoors. There are several organizations that do plein air painting during the summers. So in my small notebook, I write “Paint outdoors this summer in the San Juan Islands.” In my medium size notebook, I write the results from my web search of the names and dates of where I need to go, and anything else that I might run into that relates to that dream. I sat in the library one day, and reviewed artists magazines, and looked at the artists whose work or whose color paintings gave me a fantastic response. I wrote them down in my medium size notebook because those are things I can do to help me towards the dream itself. They give me inspiration, and possibilities. Two artists that I looked at live out in the San Juans. Perhaps I will take a trip and go to their studios.

See. That’s the way dreams work.

Dreams begin to inspire and add juice to our thoughts. We begin to conceive that dreams are possible and actions you might take begin to pop into your mind.

Action of any kind is Step Three. When our dream shrink or get forgotten, we lose our imagination, our thinking gets small, our perspective shrinks.

So catching those dreams in some way is really important. The more colorful and vibrant you can describe them, the better. And since it is a dream, you don’t have to be concerned with the “what is”. You can fully indulge in the idea. My daughter dreamed about the biggest and best horse barns. I dreamed about the greatest painting trip to Scotland. She’s now living on a horse farm as the barn and horse manager. I’m living in an exquisite area that has plenty of landscapes I can paint (and weather and topography that looks a lot like Scotland).

Cherish those dreams. They are leading you someplace. Dreams help you shift states. Writing down your dreams help them to manifest. Looking through your dream box helps you upgrade your vibration and be inspirational.

Imagination is an important function in achieving success
. Click here to read more about imagination. Imagine your dreams coming true. Be choiceful and focus on what it will be like when a dream comes true. Turn your focus and attention away from the “what is” today – including the fact the what you want is not here. Because that just highlights what’s not here. Savor the thoughts of “Won’t it be wonderful when…” For more information about this topic, review the category Focus and Imagination.

So cherish these dreams. They are important. Dare to Dream.

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“Dreams and Survival Thinking”

Monday, May 17th, 2010

Dreams and Survival Thinking usually don’t exist in the same space. Dreams can’t even exist in the same sentence hardly. Dreams are those wonderful wishes that you would love to come true some day. Living in Southern France for six months, getting to know people there, and painting wonderful watercolor landscapes are some of my favorite dreams.

Everything man creates or acquires begins in the form of desire, that desire is taken on the first lap of its journey, from the abstract to the concrete, into the workshop of the imagination, where plans for its transition are created and organized.
–Napoleon Hill

Survival thinking and being comes when we are having challenging times, like when we are out of money or out of a job. When there is not enough gas in the car to get to work or money to catch a bus, and all you can think about is not having enough money; most of us fall into survival thinking and being. The embers of our desire seem like cold ashes and there is nothing to take into our imagination workshop. Our world is cold, flat, and hard.

The thing about the survival state of being is that our thinking contracts to a very small world. We are living in a period when there is a lot of focus on the economy. Unemployment is higher, foreclosures are higher, and people are more conservative about spending money. What is the story you are telling yourself about the economy and your personal finances right now? Is it anything like, “I better keep my head down, or I might lose my job?” Or “jobs are really hard to find right now?”

Don’t these last two paragraphs just eclipse any thoughts about going to the San Juan Islands and visiting Friday Harbor this weekend for example? Chances are the “what is” (of what is happening with the economy and how it affects you personally) has shifted you more into survival thinking.

To be successful means a shift to a whole different perspective. We can’t be thinking positive thoughts, if we are consumed by the contraction of negative thoughts. We can’t be reaching for a goal, if we are scared and afraid to reach out.

One thing I realized is that I forget my dreams, when I contract into survival thinking. When we are too tired, when we are stressed about some personal issues, when we don’t have enough money, sometimes when we are not physically well, we condense into the “what is” of our life, and forget that there is a great deal more on which we can focus.

Thrive and be Successful

You have to have bigger horizons on which to focus, if you want to be successful, and thrive. This past week I found a notebook where I had been writing down my dreams, goals, desires for the future. The notebook began with a list of fun things, and then had gotten overrun with quotes. So I went to the Dollar Store and bought another small notebook that I can keep all the time, and when I remember one of my dreams, I capture it in my little notebook.

As I have been writing them down, I realized that there were several things I could do this week and this month that could give me a flavor for my dream of painting in southern France. I can drive over to Anacortes to Deception Park and have a paint out all day in in the exquisite landscapes there. If I wanted, I could take the ferry next week to Guemes Island and for $5.00 have paint out in the San Juan Islands. Both of those activities are very doable and very inexpensive, and wonderfully exotic. Both of these have been available to me for a while, and I had forgotten that opportunity, because when I get into survival, I forget about doing things which help me to thrive.

Dreams help us expand our horizon and remember there is more to our world than the current “what is.” Dreams help us imagine outcomes that we want. Dreams tantalize us to grow and expand. Dreams can help us hope and expect our dreams to come true. Imagining what it will feel like to have our dreams come true is an essential step towards success. Almost every person who has performed as an actor or musician, had dreams of standing on stage with a microphone and having everyone listen to them. Imagining paves the way to success. Dreams are the precursors to imagining. You have to have something to imagine. Those desires and dreams let us go a little soft inside and let go of the hardness that comes with scarcity and survival.

Next time we will talk about some strategies to help capture our dreams. Until then, know that your dreams of what may be are critical to making them come true. And if you are so inclined, click on some of the colored text in this blog, and it will take you to other articles that are related. Remember. You are so much more than what you seem right now!

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Now, after a year of testing, the streaming giant has released its new and improved rating system into the wild. Instead of stars, what you'll see if you fire up ...



Why the Death of Malls Is About More Than Shopping  TIME

There are still about 1100 malls in the U.S. today, but a quarter of them are at risk of closing over the next five years.



The Best Business Laptops for 2019  PC Magazine

Got work to do? Laptops built for business are thinner and more powerful than ever. Our buying advice and product recommendations will help you find your ...



The Best Smart Home Security Systems for 2019  PCMag.com

Need a security system but don't know where to start? We've tested all the major DIY and professionally installed security packages to help you determine which ...



Trademark basics | USPTO  United States Patent and Trademark Office

You may file a trademark application on your own, but if you want someone to help you or give you legal advice, you need to hire an experienced trademark ...



The Wall Street Journal & Breaking News, Business, Financial and Economic News, World News and Video  Wall Street Journal

WSJ online coverage of breaking news and current headlines from the US and around the world. Top stories, photos, videos, detailed analysis and in-depth ...



The Best Tax Software for 2019  PCMag.com

If you've never used a personal tax preparation website, 2019 is the year to start. New tax laws and forms have altered the 1040 landscape significantly, making ...



The Best Web Hosting Services for 2019  PCMag.com

If you're looking for a home for your website, look no further than the 10 services on this list. These are the best web hosting services for giving everyone from ...



TD Ameritrade: Online Stock Trading, Investing, Online Broker  The Ticker Tape

Stay on top of the market with our innovative technology, extensive product access, award-winning education, and specialized *service*. Open new account Learn ...



The best projectors for a cinema experience at home  The Telegraph

While home cinemas used to be the preserve of the extraordinarily wealthy, over the years, the price of the best projectors has come down significantly, allowing ...



Business Insider Nordic: News  Business Insider UK

Business Insider is a fast-growing business site with deep financial, media, tech, and other industry verticals. Launched in 2007, the site is now the largest ...



Bryant University: Home  Bryant University

Bryant University in Rhode Island prepares innovative leaders, offering top-ranked undergraduate and graduate degree programs in business and the liberal ...



Enjoy the convenience of managing your account online  Calgary Herald

As part of our commitment to quality *service* we have our subscriber services available to you 24/7. ...



Best Savings Accounts and Rates of February 2019  Bankrate.com

Compare savings accounts and high-interest savings accounts to find the best rates. Start by looking at high-yield accounts here.



The Best VPN Services for 2019  PC Magazine

A VPN, or virtual private network, is one of the smartest ways to protect your online privacy and maintain your data security. We've tested scores of them, and ...



Inside Amazon: Wrestling Big Ideas in a Bruising Workplace  New York Times

SEATTLE — On Monday mornings, *fresh* recruits line up for an orientation intended to catapult them into Amazon's singular way of working. They are told to ...



Sophos Home Free Review & Rating  PCMag.com

Sophos Home Free gives consumers antivirus protection built for business, including remote management, but no testing labs vouch for its accuracy.



H&R Block Deluxe 2019 (Tax Year 2018) Review & Rating  PCMag.com

H&R Block Deluxe is a comprehensive, easy-to-use tax *service* that helps e-filers claim relevant deductions and credits. The site is much improved, both in terms ...



POLITICO Playbook: The most reliable politics newsletter.  Politico

FIFTY-FIVE DAYS after PRESIDENT DONALD TRUMP bucked his party and decided to shut down the government for his border wall, he emerged with a deal ...



Mad Men (TV Series 2007–2015)  IMDb

Created by Matthew Weiner. With Jon Hamm, Elisabeth Moss, Vincent Kartheiser, January Jones. A drama about one of New York's most prestigious ad ...



Best CD Rates for February 2019  Bankrate.com

Find the best CD rates by comparing national and local rates. A Certificate of Deposit is a type of savings account that has a set interest rate and withdrawal date.



Fox Nation: Opinion Done Right | Exclusive Content | Join Today  Fox News

Join Fox Nation for exclusive *content*, access and experiences. The personalities you love and the voices that matter are all at your fingertips. Subscribe today.



University of Delaware  University of Delaware

The University of Delaware is a diverse institution of higher learning, fostering excellence in research. UD has seven colleges, providing outstanding ...



Adobe Lightroom Classic CC Review & Rating  PCMag

Adobe's Photoshop Lightroom remains the gold standard in pro photo workflow software. It's a complete package, with top-notch organization tools, state ...


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